The Unveiling

Gift wrap, scotch tape, and gift tags crowd my kitchen table and I am in good need of a back massage following dragging in bags full of groceries. Everyone’s gifts are wrapped and under the tree and I anxiously await Christmas morning to see the look of excitement on my son’s face while tearing open wrapped gifts that “Santa” has brought him. Oh! And don’t forget the spread! Tonight into the morning, there will only be time for food prepping and of course, running a few more errands and everything else that may fall in between. After all, there’s nothing like a clean house and a home cooked meal for the holidays and seeing those who you love eat and drink in pleasure.

As I sit and type this, it is now officially Christmas Eve! Everyone in the house is asleep—except me. Again, I find myself taking care of everything imaginable except something that I could really use right now which is sleep. As much as I would love to feel all warm and fuzzy inside, the truth is that I could use a break! I’ve had one hell of a week, struggled in my mood and attitude for the past few days, and every small thing became an even bigger trigger to my anger. Unfortunately, this resulted in being required to apologize too many times about behaviors which could have been prevented. Yes, prevented! All of my blow-ups could have been easily avoided had I just made a decision much earlier on to say “I’m overwhelmed”. I realize that there was only one trigger to my anger and that was me. I was carrying too heavy of a load.

Women are very interesting and special creatures. We are born nurturers and excellent caretakers of people and things. But, why does being a woman have to be so complex? There are parts about being a woman that I absolutely love; and then there is that part that brings about feelings of grief. The grief sets in because we have a tendency to become too absorbed in all of our caretaking even if it has sometimes meant taking care of people and things that were never intended to be our responsibility. I would like to speak to ways of lessening the load.

Lessening The Load

As each day goes by, I am learning that my strength is made even more perfect in admitting that I do get tired. It’s in admitting that I do not have all of the answers. It’s found in saying that I need “time”. It’s revealed in my admittance to the fact that mommy can’t fix it. What a release!!!! It feels great to acknowledge these feelings; feelings which I am able to admit occur almost daily.

Another way of lessening the load is through the act of giving. We give and pour out to others daily, but we rarely take the time to give back and pour into ourselves. It’s just like an ATM machine. There are only so many withdrawals which can be made before there is a need to make a direct deposit. So, ‘tis season for giving! I believe that the greatest gift that any woman could give herself is the gift of honesty. To be honest is to be authentic and it plays a rather significant role in how we view ourselves, others, and it also helps to create the world in which we live. I am curious as to how much different my life and relationships would have been had I made this a daily practice. There may be times when others don’t understand, are unable to receive, or will simply choose to not deal with facts or, your truth. It matters not how well received one’s truth is. What’s most important is that the decision was made in which to unveil the mask—the mask of authenticity. Although we can do nothing to change the past, be encouraged that we do have the freedom of hitting the reset button on life in relation to our future.

On Your Mark, Get Set, Reset!

As we prepare to head into a new year, I pray the abundant life for every woman everywhere! But it is also my hope that we begin to remove the masks; the masks that we wear in an attempt to convince ourselves and others of what is not. You do not have to wait for January to come or an invite to a vision board party. You have something known as the power of choice. Removing your mask is not an easy thing to do. The process is difficult because it may force you to face who you really are – including your strengths and weaknesses. It will also require you to examine who others say that they fell in love with. Sometimes people don’t fall in love with us for our true self and it becomes a case of mistaken identity when you finally begin to start walking and living your own truth. In getting back to you, it would be important for you to know that you may not always be accepted. With each new day we are extended new grace and new mercies. We are provided with additional opportunities to do better than the day before. This is a sure reminder that life does come with a reset button. This is one of the greatest gifts to all mankind and all that you have to do is push the button!

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Beautiful - India Arie